I just read over what I wrote and there’s a lot of repeat words but still no explanation of the tradition or what the present mom gives me will be. That’s just because I’m still really nervous. I keep thinking things that freak me out. What if it doesn’t work tomorrow? My junk, I mean. What if I can’t get a boner when I NEED to? But my mom. She’s like totally hot so Ijust have to hope, is all.I think my little brother Darryn, is already jealous that I’m the one that’s sixteen tomorrow. What he doesn’t understand is the pressure they’re putting me under and it’s not like I can talk to my buddies about it. But this writing thing to prepare myself is really helping me. It’s TMI but I got major wood already.Oh, I still didn’t say what IT was! The open secret. No one outside the family knows either. But WE all know. Mom’s present, like her mom gave uncle Dan and her mom gave grampa Jessie. And maybe his mom’s mom gave him too? Thinking of uncle Dan popping wood for grams is totally. I could tell right away you weren't like ... him. And, you can't protect a child forever. Like, when they start to walk, you have to let them fall. They have to learn to get on with their friends, what and how much they can drink. They have to make their own mistakes; and I've watched her blossom over the last weeks." Which brings me to the primary reason for my visit." I paused, thinking. "I have tried to communicate to Philippa that I'm a ... stepping stone, or a stop-gap, or anything but a permanent arrangement. I'm very fond ... no, let's be straight; I love your daughter, but ... as a daughter or maybe a grand-daughter, not as a girlfriend or wife. I'm afraid she'll be overwhelmed by romantic impracticality and refuse to recognise the problems and penalties of such an age difference ... and I don't want to hurt her."Helen took my hand this time. "Ted ... you know Phil and I tell each other nearly everything?"I just nodded, though I wasn't sure just how comprehensive their.
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